Pointless Epiphany

“I’m really sorry… but no. I’m sorry…”

I pause, waiting for it to sink in. But strangely, it doesn’t hurt. I keep waiting for the sting, the heartbreak, some kind of utter devastation. But nothing happens. I just feel bad for wasting their time. Perhaps embarrassed at how they perceived me.

It doesn’t hurt.

“It’s alright,” I carefully respond. “Really. I hope you have a good day.”

They walk away, worried despite my assurance. And I wonder if I ever really wanted them.

I think I’m relieved.

I don’t know what that says about me.

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The Brotherhood of the World Award!

Thank you to Claire Yang for nominating me! Check out her blog, she has some awesome writing.

The rules for this award:

1. Thank the person who nominated you and link back to their blog.

2. Answer the questions sent to you.

3. Nominate around ten bloggers.

4. Create your set of questions for your nominees.

5. List the rules and display the Brotherhood Of The World logo in your post and/or blog.

Questions for me:

Why did you start blogging?

I just wanted to share my writing online and hopefully improve by doing so. I was originally writing on Wattpad, but I didn’t like the setup/format. Someone I was talking to recommended WordPress, and I really like it so far!

What is considered a good day to you?

Any day where I’m able to be productive and have some fun.

What is that one song that motivates you to move forward?

Oh, wow, there are so many… Definitely The Last by Agust D, as well as Tomorrow by BTS, and 4 o’clock by Bang Yongguk.

How far back into your childhood can you remember? As in your first memory.

Umm my first memory is crying next to my toy kitchen. I have no idea why I was crying  though ^^;

If you could go back in time and redo something, what would it be?

My nominees:
(I don’t have 10, but here are some wonderful people:)
Questions for my nominees:
What has changed the most about you over the years?
What was your dream job as a kid?
What’s your favorite album of all time?
What advice do you want to give younger people?
When’s your favorite time of day (or night)?
Thanks for reading and have a great day 🙂 

Painted-Over Edges

You are supernovas

paint splatters

tulips

roses

forget-me-nots

 

Poison

enticing

empty promises

secrets in an open room

toxic

 

I wish I could romanticise this

(you)

but I’m out of pretty words

similes and metaphors

that paint you a plainer hue

 

You breathe hope into my skin

then watch it pale

 

Washed away

(by saltwater)

 

I can’t bear the black hole in your soul

that once was a star

 

With you, nothing is certain

and I’m grasping at the edges

 

I wish I could know what you think

when you see me

All that’s certain

is that it’s not

beauty

Pride

She’s pink

Cheeks blushing from the cold

Valentine’s cards stuffed in lockers

Sunrises mirrored in the sea

Silk gowns that brush the polished wooden floor

Lipstick marks trailing across exposed skin

Ribbons tying back rebellious curls

Long nails tapping on frosted glass windows

She’s bright, comforting, warm, childish, beautiful

She’s pink

 

They’re yellow

Warm rays at high noon

Daffodils lined up in back gardens

Soft blankets strewn across bedroom carpeting

Iced lemonade in colorful glasses

Ballons escaping from tiny hands and drifting into the clouds

Oversized hoodies that swallow me whole

Half-empty Cheerios boxes

Polaroid pictures pinned to closet walls

They’re cheerful, thoughtful, eccentric, deeper than they look

They’re yellow

 

He’s blue

Bright ocean waves

A cloudless sky

Fish swimming frantically behind glass walls

Berries picked in summer heat

Butterflies migrating to warmer homes

Bruises swelling over wet eyes

Marbles crashing into each other

Ripped jeans that look too faded

Pressed suits promising a brighter future (but never happiness)

He’s smart, honest, tired, gorgeous, bittersweet, loved

He’s blue

 

I’m undefined

Wearing pink, yellow, and blue stripes

A little out of place

A little too far gone

A little bit in love

With all of it

 

 

This marks the end of my “7 deadly sins” series! I hope y’all enjoyed it 🙂